My Pants are too Big

Yes, it has been only a week and a half and my pants are already too big. It's not that i am going hungry, we simply just don't snack over here. and when we do eat, we eat out of necessity, not for pleasure. i think this is almost the perfect description of what life it like here. They work all day for their daily bread, and water, and when they have it, they eat it, and go out and repeat the process the next day. It is sometimes hard to wrap my mind around how shockingly different life is here. In some ways you have to harden your heart to survive. Last year my dad came and visited. I took him downtown to do some shopping and we saw a women that i come across every once in a while. I don't know exactly what is wrong with here feet, maybe parasites, or elephantiasis, but her feet are so huge they do not fit in shoes. Of course the soles of her feet are very callused, i would wonder if she could feel anything. My dad just felt horrible about this women's situation. He asked me how i can see those things everyday, and the only answer i came up with was sometimes i have to harden my heart to such things or i wouldn't be able to live here. Now of course we were two americans who are used to someone, somewhere, whether the government or private support, stepping in and solving a crisis like this one. But here that is life. It doesn't matter if you are sick you still need to provide for yourself and your family. This seems like such a sad thing to say, but at the same time is it almost a blessing. Life here is simple, people work hard for what they have. I love America, i love technology and fast food, but i think those things have also made us lazy in a lot of ways. Not to say Americans don't work hard, but i think we get so caught up in our own society and culture, that we forget what life is about sometimes.

Dear God

help me

to live content with small means,

to seek elegance rather than luxury, 

and refinement rather than fashion,

to be worthy, not respectable, and wealthy, not rich,

to study hard, think quietly, talk gently, act frankly,

to listen to stars and birds, babes and sages, with an open heart. 

to bear all cheerfully,

do all bravely,

await occasions,

hurry never-

in a word, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious, 

grow up through the common.

this is to be my symphony.

amen.

William Henry Channing